A Past Revisited
by Samantha worthington
Summary: Tommy's past comes back to haunt him, how does he handle it?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"So, Colt have any news about your next fight?" Paddy asked as they made the drive from Pittsburgh to Philly the next day.

"Mmm?" Tommy was staring out the window of the old Plymouth, lost in thought. "No, he ain't said nothin'!"

Paddy grunted a reply. His relationship with his boys was already mended, there were still the odd times when something would come up from the past, but they worked through it now. They were a family, a family that they didn't have growing up, and they were happy. But they were still the strong quiet types, The Conlon men were never much for talking!

"You Ok Tommy? You've been pretty distance today!" His father observed. "How long's it been since you saw your therapist?"

He gave his father a look "Over a month, I guess!" He replied, "Pops, I'm alright, just tired s'all!" He saw the look his father was giving him. The rest of the Conlon's had convinced Tommy while he recovered from his injuries he received at Sparta, to see a therapist to help him deal with his past, family and military. Both Brendan and their Pops had agreed to go with him if he needed them to. He was totally against the idea at first, saying that training and fighting was the best therapy for him, but eventually he agreed and realized after the first month, that it really was helping him!

"You need a break from training, this weekend will do you good I think!" Paddy replied. Tommy gave his father a stunned look, never had he ever thought he'd hear anything like that come out of his father's mouth! "It's true, you look like death here lately, not just because you've dropped a weight class, Colt's got you workin' all hours and trainin' on top of that, it's not good!"

"Yeah, he's tryin' to get me in this event, not as big as Sparta, but close, down in Vegas in a couple a months. Say's this could make my career really take off!" Tommy rested his head back on the glass, staring out at the frozen October scenery.

Colt had convinced him to drop down to the next weight class, saying that agility made a better fighter, not that all that bulk wasn't helpful, but Tommy couldn't maneuver like the lighter fighters. He was still Tommy 'The Tank' Conlon, his overall physique was still larger than the normal middle weight contenders, but as long as he kept his weight close to 185 lbs. it was all good!

"Good, good!" His father grunted, "Now, get some rest, don't want to be scarin' Rosie and Emily into thinkin' zombies are real, do ya?"

Tommy hadn't been a big fan of little kids, hell any kids besides Manny's, until he met his two beautiful nieces two years ago, he loved playing with Emily and Rosie, but he'd quickly make an escape when it came to tea parties and dress up time. "S'pose not!" He replied, closing his eyes, hoping that for the next 5 ½ hours his mind would be filled with that brown-eyed beauty once again.

But he would be disappointed, _the blackness behind his eyelids turned into blinding light and the sounds of explosions and people screaming filled his ears. He could smell the burning all around him, flesh, wood, fuel. He heard the jets whizzing overhead. He saw the flagman face down in the sand, the stars and stripes held tightly in his outstretched hand. Grabbing the flag and waving it furiously, Tommy screamed at the fighter jets as they did another Passover, still not realizing that they were friendlies!_

_Shit, where was Manny? He screamed for his brother. He scanned the area, frantically searching for him, with no trace. 'Fuck, he's gone! I failed Pilar, lil' Man' and Eva!' He thought, when suddenly someone grabbed him from behind and pulled him along the sand, it was Manny, he was hurt, but he was determined to get them to safety._

_"What the hell is going on?" Manny yelled over the confusion, "Don't they see the flag?" They were under "friendly fire", but they had yet to see what was so friendly about it, half of Tommy's unit had been wiped out, the other half would probably die from their injuries before anyone got there to help them! It was just him and Manny running for their lives from men they called their brothers! _

_Another jet whizzed overhead, unloading machine gun fire into the sand around them, they kept running until they found shelter inside one of the small shacks that made up the village, or what was left of it. _

_"Damn it! My radio's busted, Manny, give me yours!" Tommy cursed, no reply, "Manny!" Tommy looked around, Manny wasn't beside him, "FUCK!" He saw the body of his best friend, his brother, laying in the dirt street, eyes to the sky and lips moving in prayer. "MANNY!"_

_Tommy burst from his hiding spot as he heard the last of the jet engines fade into the distance. Manny was whispering a hurried prayer over and over as bloodstained tears ran down his face. Tommy held onto his friend, promising that he would be alright, that help would be there soon, but help came too late, Manny had died in his arms after making him promise to take care of Pilar and the kids, just minutes after Tommy reached him. He held onto Manny's lifeless body, trying to convince himself that this wasn't happening, that Manny would be alright, as tears ran down his face and grief ridden sobs racked his body. He decided then and there that this would be the last he would see of Afghanistan!_

_My god, how would be tell Pilar that she was now a widow and the kids that they were now fatherless? He knew he had to be the one, even though it was his fault his best friend had died!_

_When the cleanup crew arrived to collect the bodies, they thought they were going to have to shoot Tommy so he would give up his grip on the lifeless body in his arms. _

_"Sir, we need to get you back to base camp and get those injuries looked at!" A young private replied, pulling Tommy to his feet._

_Huh? Hurt, Tommy didn't feel any pain, he was numb all over, numb with grief, numb with anger. Tommy attacked the young private, "Take your filthy hands off of me, Damn traitors, all of ya!" He yelled at the men. He was like a maniac, throwing insults at them, attacking anyone who came too close, his grief stricken mind along with the confusion of that what had happened, that he was the only one of twenty left alive, was telling him that they were all enemies, despite the US flags on their uniforms. He had been betrayed by the people he had trusted the most! Finally, he had to be tackled to the ground and sedated before he was loaded into a truck and taken back to camp._

He awoke with a start, he almost jumped out of his seat. "Tommy! What's wrong?" Paddy asked, laying a hand on his youngest sons arm soothingly as he slowed the car to a stop.

It took Tommy a few minutes to come to his senses and realize he was dreaming. He wiped the sweat from his face and pinched the bridge of his nose tightly between his thumb and pointer finger. "I think I'll call Donovan when we get back on Monday!" He sighed. This was the first nightmare he'd had in a long time, he thought that he had stopped blaming himself a long time ago for what had happened, guess he was wrong, now it was time for another trip to the therapist!

Colt wasn't gonna like this, him taking more time out of training! Of course Colt knew Tommy had went through a lot of shit both at war and at home, he knew the therapy was a necessity, but the raw emotions that Tommy showed in his fights started to slowly disappear after he started those sessions, he was still an aggressive fighter, but he wasn't the same, he was releasing his anger in another form, not just with his fights and training.

"Hmm, Good!" His father grunted, he hadn't agreed with the therapy that had been offered to him when he returned from war, thought it was a pussy way out of dealing with your problems, but now looking back, he realized his mistake. If he had taken the offered help, would he have been a different man, husband and father? Would his boys have grown up with their loving parents together instead of separated? He had wound his mind around all of these thoughts when Brendan suggested the therapy for Tommy at first and threw himself into the battle to get his son help, not wanting him to end up like him. "You shouldn't go so long in between sessions, just when you start thinkin' you're ok, the memories will sneak up on you again and swallow you whole!"

Tommy looked at his father, knowing what he said was coming from experience. He nodded, "Yeah, I know Pop! I'm ok now, come on let's get goin', don't want to miss tha party!" He plastered a grin across his face, hoping that it convinced his father he was ok, but guilt swirled once again in the pit of his stomach, he tried to push it aside until Monday. He willed himself to stay awake for the remainder of the drive, talking about the upcoming UFC fights and other mindless small talk he and his father could come up with to keep his mind focused on the present.

About an hour later they pulled into Brendan's driveway. They were greeted by the two young girls, who burst through the front door before Paddy even got the key out of the ignition.

"Grandpa! Uncle Tommy!" They shouted as they latched onto the legs of either man. Tommy lifted little Rosie onto his shoulders after giving her a hug and a kiss on the top of her dark curly head.

"And how are my two favorite girls doin'?" Paddy asked as they walked up the path to the house. The girls talked up a whirlwind about school and their Christmas dance recitals and everything else that had happened since they had last saw each other. The men laughed at their chatter and both promised to come and spend the holidays with them so they could watch them dance to the Nutcracker the day before Christmas Eve.

"Tommy! Pop! You made it!" Tess greeted as they entered the house. "It's good to see you guys!" She gave them both a hug, stepping back to have a look at Tommy's sleeker frame! "Looks like Colt's been workin' you a bit hard, eh?"

"Yeah, he talked me into droppin' a weight class a few months back." Tommy replied setting Rosie down onto the couch to watch television with her sister.

"Mom, Uncle Tommy and Grandpa are spending Christmas with us, right?" She looked at the two men then to her mother.

"Really? Well, that will be lovely, the whole family together for the holidays!" She smiled. "Brendan will be so happy!"

"Speakin' of, where is the old bastard anyways?" Tommy laughed, then quickly apologized to his nieces for his language.

"He's down in the basement, he's setting up some kind of home gym down there!" She rolled her eyes and laughed. "The garage is getting too cold to work out in apparently, so he's converting some space down there to use."

"Well, let's go take a look!" Paddy replied, heading for the basement door. "Brendan! How're ya?"

Tommy followed, the thought of working out intrigued him now, it was the only thing that really took his mind off of his, well, mind!

"Pop! Tommy! Hey, I'm glad you guys could make it!" Brendan replied, wiping the sweat from his face with a towel. He had started building walls for his workout room and was just putting up the last of the drywall.

"Happy birthday my boy!" Paddy replied, giving his eldest a hug.

"What, you ain't got enough money to hire somebody to do this for ya?" Tommy joked as Brendan pulled him into a hug that quickly turned into a headlock.

"Tap!" Brendan laughed, holding his brother tight.

"Hell no!" Tommy grunted.

"Ok, don't kill each other in the first hour, alright?" Paddy replied, swatting at his boys with his trademark salt and pepper hat.

"Nah, I prefer to do it myself! Old habits die hard, right?" Brendan replied as he let his brother go. "What happened to you? I could barely get my arms around you six months ago, now it's like huggin' Tess!"

Tommy gave his brother a stern look then proceeded to tell him about his decision to move down to middleweight. Then they once again fell into talking about upcoming fights and about the last UFC that had aired.

By now, they were sitting at the kitchen table, Brendan with Rosie perched on his knee and Tommy with Emily on his, drinking coffee while they waited for Tess to finish making lunch. All three men had offered to help, but got quickly shooed away from the stove. "You guys go catch up!" She had smiled at them.

She took a moment away from her cooking to grab her cell, the men where in deep conversation with the girls about some piano recital their dolls where having the next morning, it was a Kodak moment that she couldn't resist capturing.

"So, Tommy, have you found yourself a girl yet?" She asked, giving him a sly smile.

"Boyd don't give him enough time to find one!" Paddy replied, "Their nothin' but a distraction anyways!" He grinned evilly at her.

"One of these days Paddy Conlon, one of these days!" She replied with an angry tone that cracked with laughter, as she shook her fist at him.

"Pops is right, Colt's been workin' me pretty hard, between training and the other stuff he gets me to do 'round the gym, I don't got time fer nothin' else. Besides, there ain't much around the Burgh only ones ya gotta buy!" He grinned.

Emily turned to look at him, eyes as big as dinner plates, "You have to buy a girlfriend in Pittsburgh?" She was awestruck, "Well, you should move down here with us, daddy's friends don't have to pay for their girlfriends!"

They all looked at her, then to Brendan and Tess, bursting out in laughter at the little 9 year old. The men where almost in tears.

"Well, it's true, right daddy? And besides, you'd be closer to us then!" She smiled sweetly at her Uncle

"Well, we'll see, ok honey?" Tommy replied, wiping a tear from the corner of his eye, still chuckling at her earlier comment. She seemed pleased with that, grabbing her little sister's hand and leading her back into the living room where the music of My Little Pony was spilling from the TV.

"God, you don't know what's gonna come out of her mouth!" Brendan replied shaking his head.

The fell back into mindless drabble as they ate lunch, Tommy's guilt still consuming him, he felt like the walls were closing in on him. He had to get out of the house for a bit, he decided a run might do it!

"He still seein' his therapist?" Brendan asked his father when the front door closed behind Tommy. "He seems distant."

"I know, he said it's been over a month, but something happened on the way here, he had a memory or somethin', he wouldn't tell me about it, said he was just tired, but he agreed to see Donovan when we get back on Monday!"

"Good!" Brendan replied, "I worry 'bout him, ya know, I don't want to see him turn back into that cold hearted person he was a few years ago!"

Paddy grunted his agreement and sighed.

"I think if he had a girl, it might help take his mind off of things!" Tess replied, trying to conceal the grin spreading across her face.

"Now Tess, don't go trying to play matchmaker!" Brendan warned, "Like Pop said, you women are nothing but a distraction!" This earned him a swat on the back of the head.

"I just think it would do him good, to have someone other than us and Donovan to talk to and experience new things with! And besides, I might just have the perfect person in mind for him!"

Brendan gave his wife an exasperated look, "And who might that be?" He cocked his eyebrow at her.

"Miss Phillips, the girls dance teacher!"

Brendan thought it over for a minute, "Ya, she's nice, pretty, but I dunno if she's Tommy's type!"

"Well, we will see! The next time he comes for a visit, I'll introduce them!" She replied, confident that her plan would work.

Tommy jogged around the block a few times, his mind wandering, this time it stopped on the memory of when Emily transferred from his unit. _She had said that it didn't look good for them to be a couple and in the same platoon, favoritism was how she put it. Besides, she was getting more interested in becoming a translator, with her fluent Russian, Oromo and French. Reluctantly he had agreed, he found it very hard at first not having her around, but he knew now, that she was a little safer working from camp then being in the field with him. _

_She was in Kabul when Manny died just outside of Kandahar. She had hurried back as soon as she heard, but Tommy was already accompanying Manny's body back to the States. She wanted to be with him when he told Pilar, to help him and her get through this time, but he hadn't responded to her calls, texts or emails. He was a mess, emotionally, physically, he didn't want to drag her down with him!_

_He wasn't back in Kandahar a week before he decided enough was enough, he had to get out of there! He had avoided the office, he was ashamed of himself, for letting Manny die, for letting Manny's family down, for letting her down! He was a shell of a man, and she deserved much better than that! _

_It was dark, Tommy was on patrol near the Mirwais Nikka Hospital when he made a break for it. He was only a few miles from the outskirts of the city, he was certain he could make it, and his unit, they had no idea he was gone! He tried to avoid the main streets and the heavily guarded areas on his way. He had no clue how he was going to get through the desert to the next town, he didn't care, he just had to get out of there!_

_He couldn't remember how many days he had been running when he came across a tank, blown upside down in a river. There where people screaming for help and that there was still someone inside the tank. Tommy's instincts kicked in, he jumped into the water and pried the back door to the tank off with a rush of adrenaline and pulled the Private out. Reality hit him hard then, he had to get the fuck away from there as fast as he could before he was detained and questioned before being thrown into the military jail for deserting._

_He knew that before he could safely get out of the country, he had to find someone who could help him erase his past life, he had to start over with a clean slate. That someone came to him one night as he roamed the streets of some village not far from the boarder. With whatever money he had left he bought himself that new life, new passport, new name, he was no longer Staff Sargent Tommy Conlon, he was now Tommy Riordon, civilian! _

_He caught a redeye flight back State side as soon as he had those new papers in his hand. He didn't really know where he was going to go, the cancer had taken his mom in Tuscan, he couldn't think about looking for Brendan and he really didn't want to go back with his Pops either, so he decided to pay Pilar and the kids a visit first. She had talked him into going back to his family, to try and work things out, even though that was the last thing he wanted to do!_

When he turned back onto Brendan's street, he could see his brother sitting on the front steps waiting for him. "It's pretty chilly out for a jog, ain't it?"

Tommy shrugged, "Nah, it's just the right temperature!" He replied as he took a seat beside his brother.

"So, how've ya been doin'?" Brendan asked, staring out into the street. "You seem a bit distant."

He rolled his eyes and sighed, "Look Bren, I'm fine. I've been workin' and trainin' a lot lately, I'm exhausted s'all!"

"O.K, but I want you to know I'm here for ya if ya need me!" Brendan replied, still staring out into the street.

"I know Bren, thanks!" He clapped his brother on the shoulder as they stood to go back inside, "Well, let's get back to the party you old fart!" He gave his brother his crooked grin as they walked back into the house.

A few of Brendan's and Tess' friends began arriving just as Tommy went to grab a shower. He let the hot water run over his body, trying to keep his mind blank, he didn't want to fall back into a mindless zombie stuck in the past and have his family worrying about him on Brendan's birthday. He toweled off and got dressed quickly and headed back downstairs. He greeted everyone with a hand shake and a smile, but stuck close to Pops. Tommy had always been a bit shy and found it hard to make friends.

Paddy made sure to keep a close eye on Tommy's alcohol intake, Colt had stressed little to no alcohol while in training, but Tommy wasn't a big drinker anymore, not since he came back from Afghanistan and started training again. He sat quietly at the kitchenette with Paddy, briefly chatting with the guests as they inquired about his future in the MMA.

Rosie and Emily raced into the kitchen followed quickly by their mother, "Uncle Tommy, its cake time!" Emily replied excitedly as Tess took the large cake from the refrigerator.

"Well, that sure looks good!" Paddy replied.

"We helped Mommy make it for Daddy!" Rosie smiled.

"Really, does that mean I get a one of a kind Emily and Rosie cake for my birthday too?" Tommy asked with his crooked grin.

The girls looked at each other wide-eyed, "Can we Mommy?" They asked in unison.

"Well, I can't see why not!" Tess smiled, "I just don't know how it would hold up over the five hour drive to Pittsburgh though!"

"We could make it at Grandpa's house then!" Emily replied, determined.

"We'll see!" Tess replied lighting the candles. "Come on then, Daddy's waiting!"

They all entered the living room singing the Happy Birthday song, the girls jumped into their fathers lap to help blow out all of his candles.

"So, Daddy, what did you wish for?" Rosie asked.

"Oh, I can't tell, because it won't come true!" Brendan smiled.

The weekend went by quickly and before they realized it, it was Sunday evening and they were packing up the car to head back to Pittsburgh.

"Bye Grandpa, bye Uncle Tommy! Don't forget, you're coming back for Christmas, right?" Emily replied as they stepped out onto the driveway.

Tommy looked to his father, then to Brendan who had an expectant smile on his face, "Yeah, sweetheart, we'll be back for Christmas!" He smiled.

"Now, don't forget, if you need anything, give us a call, I mean it!" Brendan replied as he gave his little brother a hug goodbye.

"Thanks Bren!" Tommy replied, "See you guys in a few months!" He waved at the little family as he got into the car.

Pops and Brendan exchanged a few hushed words before they hugged and said their good byes. Tommy knew it was something to do with him, he wished that they would stop worrying so much about him, he was fine!

The drive back was a little longer than they had expected, it had snowed heavily the night before and the roads where slick with ice. Tommy had offered to drive but Paddy had refused, telling him to get some rest, which he did, he was thoroughly exhausted from the weekend and life in general. He thought about taking the entire day off tomorrow, rest up a bit then go see Donovan in the afternoon.

When they got home, Tommy gave Colt a quick call to let him know his plans for Monday.

"Do what you've got to do brother, but you need to get all the training in that you can! I got you signed on for Rage in the Cage in February!" Colt replied, a little stressed. He had pulled some tight strings to get Tommy into this event and he sure as hell didn't want him to lose!

"Yeah, I know, thanks man, I appreciate it! I've…, there's…, I've been having nightmares again, and I really think I need to start seeing Donovan again. I'll try to keep our sessions outside of training hours, K?"

"Ok, buddy, I know you need these therapy sessions, I can't imagine what you went through over there. But I'm glad to hear that it's helpin' ya out! Well, I guess I'll see ya bright and early Tuesday mornin'?"

"Yeah, I'll be there with bells on!" Tommy laughed as he hung up the phone.

"Do you need me to come with you tomorrow?" Paddy asked as Tommy entered the kitchen, poking his head into the refrigerator.

"Nah, Pops its ok, thanks though!"

"Do ya need a ride?"

Tommy thought for a second, he was gonna just catch the subway uptown, "Yeah, sure Pop!"

Paddy smiled, they had come such a long ways since his sons return, a simple question like that would have sent Tommy into a rage over two years ago, but their relationship was mended as well as it could be. He was still visiting AA, determined that he was going to reach another 1000 days sober, and he was doing a good job at it too. Tommy and Brendan could see the yearn in their fathers eyes dwindle every time he saw a liquor store, he was happy now, he didn't need that crap to make life easier anymore.

Tommy awoke the next morning around 9 o'clock, he could hear his father shuffling around downstairs, probably making breakfast. Quickly he jumped in the shower and got ready for the day. His sleep had been heavy with no dreams or memories, he'd thank god when he awoke that he wasn't drenched in sweat with his heart beating a mile a minute against his chest.

"Mornin' Pops!" Tommy greeted as he came down the stairs.

"Mornin' Tommy my boy! Are you hungry? I made breakfast!" Paddy beamed, standing in front of the stove with a spatula in one hand and a frying pan in the other.

"Starving!" He replied sitting at the table.

"So what time are you going to see Donovan?" He asked as he spooned some scrambled eggs onto his plate.

"'Round 1 o'clock."

Tommy entered the high-rise building that housed his therapist's office shortly before 1 o'clock. He kind of dreaded coming here, but when he left, he felt like a small bit of weight was lifted off of his shoulders. He hated having to relive his dreams, the memories he'd rather forget.

"Good afternoon Tommy, it's been a while!" Donovan replied as Tommy took a seat in the office.

"Yeah, I guess a bit too long!" Tommy replied.

"The dreams started again?"

"Yeah, I've been findin' it real hard to sleep and concentrate lately, the memories come back at random times and it's hard to bring myself back to reality, it's like I get stuck in them or somethin', it's weird!"

"Well, start by telling me what they are about!" Donovan replied, pulling a note pad out of his desk.

Tommy started with the same dream of Manny's death, then he went into the memories he had of Emily. He hadn't ever mentioned her before, not to Donovan, not to Brendan or their father and he didn't know why he hadn't!

This came as a surprise to his therapist, but he didn't interrupt, he let Tommy tell his story before he said anything.

"So, how come I've never heard of this Emily before?"

"I dunno, I hadn't had any dreams or memories of her until a few weeks ago, and since that first one, it's like everywhere I turn, there she is! But it's not really her, I see her in every woman that passes! Shit, I dunno, I think I'm goin' crazy!"

"Do you think it's because you're feeling the guilt of leaving her the way you did, that your subconscious wants you to make peace with her like you have with your family?"

"Yeah, I want to do that, but it's been so long since I last saw her, I dunno doc if I can do it, I mean look her in the face after all this time and beg for her forgiveness!" Tommy shook his head, he wanted nothing more than to see her face again, but he was afraid of her reaction, would she be happy to see him? Of course not, he'd hurt her way too much, she probably still hated him! "Besides, I wouldn't even know where to look for her, I don't have any contacts left in the Corps, I left them all behind when I finished my punishment tour after Sparta!"

"Well, I will see what I can do to help you there!"

"Thanks doc!" Tommy was nervous now, he knew that if his doc could find her, he'd have no choice but to confront the biggest fear he had left now!


	2. Prologue

**Prologue**

He caught a glimpse of her across the street, was it her? Could it possibly be her? 'Nah, why would she be in the Burgh?' Tommy thought to himself, shaking his head. She wouldn't have come looking for him after all these years, would she? Maybe, after all the publicity he got from Sparta, just maybe! But that was 2 years ago! He tried to shake the thoughts from his head and focus on his punching bag, telling himself that it wasn't her, but the memories from Russia came flooding back to him.

_Their unit was stranded in Northern Russia after their aircraft went down. She and Tommy got separated from the rest of the survivors in a snow storm as they tried to make their way across the Belukha Mountains back to civilization. _

_It was getting dark, and they knew that had to find shelter. The wind was blowing the snow around them like small tornados as they trudged through it. Emily started to fall behind, exhausted from the days travels._

"_Private, come on, keep up!" Tommy called over his shoulder. When there came no answer, he stopped and turned, "Private, come on we got to find some kinda shelter soon!"_

"_Damn it, I know! I'm comin'!" She cursed at him under her breath, ready to try a jog through the snow to catch up when he caught her by the wrist. "Hey!" She yelled as he pulled her along with him._

"_I've lost too many men today, I'm not gonna lose another one!" He growled. They mustered on, Tommy not letting go of Emily's wrist, until they finally found a small patch of trees. "This'll have'ta do!" He replied, setting his pack down._

_Emily scoped out the terrain, hoping for something better than this. Sure, she was a Marine and she had spent nights in some awful places, but never had she been stranded in sub-zero temperatures! "Sir, am I seeing things?" She asked, pointing off into the distance._

_Tommy looked up to where she was pointing. A shack! Dammit, how did he not see that before? "Come on Private!" He replied, grabbing up his pack once more. It took them a good hour to get to the shack, but they still had enough day light to survey things. It was a search and rescue cabin, what luck! The door was locked with a pad lock, which Tommy used his tack knife to ply open. _

_Once inside, they threw their packs down and began taking stock of their supplies and what supplies they could find left at the cabin, then they rummaged for things to use to start a fire. An old chair, that would do just fine! Tommy beat the chair into pieces and proceeded to start a fire. "Well, this'll do for about an hour!" He frowned, looking around the room. "Find whatever wood and paper we can!" Unfortunately, the cabin had been cleaned out, there wasn't much left there. Their Military whites fought off the raw sting of the cold, but it wasn't quite enough to survive the night here with no other form of heat. Tommy resorted to emptying a small cupboard and tearing it from the wall. They sat huddled around the fire place, thawing their fingers and toes by the small flames. _

_They were quiet for the most part, neither being much of a conversationalist. Tommy sat, deep in his thoughts, cursing how this was how he had to spend the last few days of his tour before he was sent back to the States, not that there was anything back there for him now anyways. He still couldn't find it in his heart to forgive Brendan or his father for their past! He wondered if his Pops was still a drunk, or did he finally drown in the liquor. High hopes! He laughed to himself. And what about Brendan, did Pops take him down with him? He hadn't spoken to his brother in over six years!_

"_Sir, permission to speak freely?" Emily asked._

"_Tommy, not Sir, just Tommy! Forget tha' politics and all that bullshit, ok?" He replied, a little bit more harsh then he intended. His expression softened a bit._

"_Oh,… Ok, Tommy, how long do you think we'll be out here before someone finds us?" She asked, not really use to the civilian way she was conversing with her Staff Sargent._

"_Dunno, really." He replied, tossing a small piece of kindling on the fire. "From what I can figure, we're on the Kazakhstan side of the boarder, which means we could be in for some trouble if we are found, either by the military or the FSB! Let's just hope our guys find us first!" She nodded in agreement, hoping the later would be their way out of here!_

_Night had fallen fast, and the temperatures had dropped dramatically, it was cold enough in the sun, but after dark it was worse! Their little fire didn't produce that much heat as they cuddled in close to it to get some sleep. Emily woke sometime later to Tommy mumbling in his sleep. She watched him for a bit before finally deciding on waking him. His full lips moving ever so slightly as he murmured incoherent things, his brow furrowed. She thought he looked like a child dreaming. She was fairly new to the Unit, and hadn't spent much time around Tommy like the rest of their team, only what was required by her rank._

"_Sir? Uh, Tommy?" She laid a hand on his shoulder, gently shaking him._

"_Mmm, what? What is it Emily?" He asked, rolling over onto his back, eyes half hidden behind heavy lids._

"_You were, um, talking in your sleep." She replied sheepishly._

"_Mmm, sorry!" Was his reply as he returned to his side, eyes shut tight again, he pulled his toque down over his eyes, blocking out the fires light._

_She shivered slightly as she decided to make some tea. They had filled whatever water proof container they could find with snow so they would have plenty of water. Water was the key to survival, she had learned that in boot camp. She wrapped her fingers around the little metal mug she pulled from her pack, loving the warmth coming from it. With every sip, she could feel warmth travelling from her lips to every part of her body. As she drank the last of that wonderful warmth, she mimicked Tommy, pulling her toque down low and drifting off to sleep._

_They had awoke the next morning to howling winds and blowing snow harassing the walls and roof of the little cabin. 'Great!' Was all Tommy could think. 'A fuckin' snow storm!'_

"_Well, I guess we ain't goin' nowhere today!" He replied, glancing out the small window. Snow had gathered around the base of the cabin about two feet he guessed, and it would only get higher as the day went on, they might just have to dig their way out of their shelter if they wanted to get a move on the next day, or whenever this storm decided to stop. "Fuck!" He growled, running a hand over his face._

"_Here!" She offered him a steaming mug, "Tea!" She replied, he had arched an eyebrow at her questioningly. _

"_Thanks!" He took the mug, grateful for the warmth it provided. He sized her up, for the first time since she joined his unit, he hadn't taken the time before. She was young, not much younger than him though, maybe 22 and she was quite the looker, not too many of them made it into the Marines as anything but nurses or office clerks. But here was a beautiful young woman dressed in combat whites and in survival mode. 'Weird', he thought, most girls he knew, where to into themselves, didn't really give a shit about the world around them, unless it involved make- up or clothes! _

_He studied her a bit more as she rummaged through her pack, brow furrowed as she searched for something she couldn't find. "Ah ha! Here we go!" She replied proudly, she held up a pack of cards. "At least we won't be bored to death while we're stuck in here!" She smiled._

_He looked at her skeptically, "These military issued, Private?" He asked, cocking an eyebrow._

_She stared at him blankly for a second, then replied, "No, Sir!"_

"_Relax Emily, I'm just bustin' your balls!" He smirked. "So, I guess go fish is out of order then!" He replied as she expertly shuffled the cards._

_She smirked back, "Not quite! Do you know Queens?" She pulled a scrap of paper from her pocket and a pen._

"_Ah, no, don't think I've ever heard of it before!" He replied, sitting opposite her by the fire._

"_K, well, you start with 13 cards, you have to get 3 of a kind in order to get points, every 3 of a kind you get, when it's your turn, lay them down face up in front of you. Then pick one card from the pack and keep placing your 3 of a kind until you have no more, 2's are wild, you can used them with any pair. Then when you can't lay down anymore throw one back on the pile."_

"_Ok, so what's the object of the game?"_

"_Whoever gets to 2000 points first wins. All cards are worth 5 points except 10, joker, king, and queen, their 10, ace is 15 and the queen of spades is worth 100! Got it?"_

"_Sure, come on deal them cards out, let's get started!"_

_Over the next few hours, Tommy had become pretty good at this new game and he had let his walls drop a bit, actually laughing and joking with the 'Kid' as he referred to all newer recruits. They had been so immersed in the game, they forgot about the raging storm outside and their situation. There was a bond forming between them that neither had expected. _

Tommy remembered how he still enjoyed that card game and wished he had someone to play it with now as he continued to drill the punching bag. Brendan wasn't much into cards, neither was Tess, but he smiled as he remembered the look on Em's face when she creamed him at it every time, a look of complete satisfaction.

_That night had been extremely cold, they both sat shivering by the fire that was threatening to go out. They had burned almost all of the available kindling. Tommy fought against the urge, but finally gave in, craving warmth, he stretched out a hand, pulling her to him._

_A look of shock came over her face, "What, you wanna freeze to death here?" He asked, "Body heat, mountain climbers do it all the time in these situations!" _

_She nodded, hoping this wasn't going to get weird and awkward as she cuddled into him. They lay beside the fire, both relishing in their newfound heat source. Tommy kept up conversation, hoping to keep them both relaxed. He could feel how stiff she was beneath his arm, nervous and uncomfortable._

"_So, Kid, where're ya from anyway?" His breath soft against her ear._

"_Leesburg, Georgia." She replied. That's it, he picked up on her slight southern accent the first time she spoke. "You?"_

"_Washington, Tacoma." _

"_Washington? Really?" She sounded very skeptical._

"_Yeah, why, don't believe me?"_

"_Your accent says more like, Pennsylvania then Washington."_

"_Hmm, well, you're right, I lived in Pittsburgh till I was 'bout 14, then me and my mom moved to Tacoma."_

"_I see, why'd you guys move?"_

_He didn't want to dive into the gory details of his past again, but he told her that his dad was an alcoholic and beat up on him and his mom and that's why they left._

"_So, you're an only child?"_

"_Um, no." Damnit, he had to bring up Brendan again, Paddy's favorite son! "I've got an older brother, Brendan." Paddy didn't take his drunken spite out on Brendan, like he did him and his mom. And the day they left the Burgh, he despised Brendan for staying with Paddy! He was his big brother, he was supposed to be there to protect him, and he wasn't, time and time again, he wasn't there!_

"_You guys don't get along?" She questioned, hearing his tone drop at the mention of his brother's name._

"_Nah, I haven't seen him since I left Pittsburgh!" He confessed._

"_Really? Wow!" She murmured._

_Eager to take the spotlight off of himself, "So, what about you, you got any brothers or sisters?"_

"_Nope, it's just me!" She quietly replied as she brushed a stay strand of light brown hair from her eyes._

"_Lucky!"_

"_In some ways, yeah I am I guess, I was spoiled rotten when I was a kid!" She laughed, "But, you get lonely after a while!"_

"_What, where you a loner? Didn't have any friends?"_

"_Oh, I had lots of friends, it's just not the same, you can play with your friends and all, but to have that special bond with a sibling," She sighed, "I dunno, it's just not the same!" Her voice was a bit on the sad side._

"_What? There's something you're not tellin' me, come on, I told you about my asshole of a dad, don't ya at least owe me?" He smiled against the back of her head._

"_Well, I wasn't always an only child." Her voice shook, "I had a brother, a twin brother!" Tommy stiffened and stayed silent, letting her finish. "He developed pneumonia when we were 5, he died just before our sixth birthday!" He felt something warm and wet hit his exposed wrist, understanding hit him._

"_Geeze, I'm sorry!" He replied, in a very non-Tommy like tone. He reached up and wiped the tears from her cheeks. She was embarrassed now, she was a Marine, she was tough, she didn't cry, crying was a form of weakness! She sat up quickly, turning her face away from him and wiping at it fiercely with the back of her glove._

"_Hey, it's ok!" Tommy couldn't believe what he was hearing, was that really his voice, speaking in a low soothing tone? He didn't think he even had that kind of gentleness in him! He sat up and put a hand on her shoulder which shook slightly as she fought back the tears. "Come 'ere! Its ok, Em', its ok!" He pulled her into a tight hug, which she returned, "There's nothin' to be embarrassed about, e'erybody cries sometimes, even the most hardened Marine!" He smiled down at her as she looked up and gave him a criticized look, which made him laugh a little._

_Man, what the fuck was goin' on, this is so not Tommy Conlon's style, all this lovey dovey bullshit! What was this chick doing to him? He put those thoughts to the back of his mind along with Brendan and Pops._

_It didn't take her long to drift off as Tommy gently stroked her hair and back. Her sobs subsided into deep sleep filled breaths not long after he pulled her back to him. And shortly after, he felt his eyelids starting to drop and sleep overtook him!_

_The storm was still raging when Tommy awoke the next morning. 'Damnit!' He thought before he even opened his eyes, he heard the wind still howling. Then he felt movement beside him, his eyes flicked open, in a stunned moment, he had forgotten their sleeping arrangements last night. He looked down into her face, she was still fast asleep, her face cuddled into Tommy's chest. He pulled the blanket up around them more and decided on a few more hours sleep._

_The storm seemed unwilling to stop, this was their third night in that cabin, a part of him was itching to get out of there and home, but another part of him wasn't as willing to leave. He was enjoying this time with Emily. The only other person in the Corps that he had had any kind of a personal relationship with was Manny, and that little bastard was on leave and back in Texas with his family. _

_That third day was spent mastering card games again. "Fuck Em', I'm sure glad you brought these damn things with ya, I think I'd go crazy with nothin' to do!" He replied as they finished a hand, he was teaching her Texas Hold 'em. She hadn't been a big poker fan, but she gave in, having run out of games of her own!_

_They had shared a lot of childhood memories that day and they shared their boot camp experiences too. She'd had it rough growing up, losing her twin, parents divorced shortly after. She'd worked two jobs and went to college before she decided on joining the Marines. No one in her family where in the Military, so it was a bit strange for her to take this route, but she seemed content with her choice. _

She was hard headed, that was one thing Tommy loved about her, she would fight till she proved her point, and he was on the receiving end of that stick more than enough times over two years!

"_Tommy, ya think we're ever gonna get out of here?" She asked that night while cuddled into his arms._

"_Tomorrow!" He replied, confident the storm couldn't last any longer than that!_

"_You sound pretty sure, whaddya do, pray to the snow gods or something?" She giggled. God he loved that sound!_

_He chuckled at her remark, "Ya, me 'n Ehecatl are real close!"_

"_Who?" She laughed even harder at the name she thought he had just made up!_

"_Ya know, the Aztec God of wind!" He replied matter of factly._

_Leaning up on her elbow, she looked at him, "And how do you know that?"_

"_My friend Manny, his family was raised on the Aztec Gods, he taught me about 'em!" He replied. She was really interested now, different religions was something she enjoyed reading up on. She looked at him expectantly, "What?"_

"_Go on, tell me more about your Manny's gods! I love that stuff!" _

_He rolled his eyes, it was years ago that Manny had told him that stuff, he was lucky that he remembered Ehecatl! "O.K. If I do, do you promise to lay back down, I'm freezin' 'ere!"_

_She slithered back under the blanket, waiting for him to continue. And so he did, he told her what little he could remember. He didn't know what it was, but after that short lived, trivial conversation, he had a sudden urge to lean in and kiss her and the most passionate kiss he could muster too! He looked down at her, studying her face as he fought this urge, but he found that the look in her beautiful brown eyes matched his, he gently brushed his thumb across her cheek and pressed his lips to hers. For a second, he didn't know what kind of a reaction to expect, a slap, knee to the family jewels, but he received the sweetest kiss in return, one that had yet to be matched. Her hand snaked around his neck holding him to her. The kiss deepened and he felt himself wanting to pull away, his mind screaming that this was not right, he could lose his rank for this, but he didn't care!_

"_Tommy!" She'd breathed as he kissed a trail across her jaw and down her neck. Their fatigue jackets in a heap beside them. _

"_Hmm?" He moaned into her neck._

"_Should we…, is this.., right?" Her breaths where coming in gasps as Tommy found the sweet spot behind her ear, nibbling at her, driving her crazy!_

_He looked her square in the face, "If you want to stop…" He was cut off as she pulled him back to her, thirsty for more._

_Their bare skin immune to the cold as a fire inside them ignited. Tommy's hands feverously fought to find her warm flesh through the layers of clothing, stripping them from her with a passion he hadn't experienced before. He trailed kisses from her lips, down her neck to her collarbone, gently nipping at the tender flesh there. Hands roaming her body, finding the buckle of her belt, quickly pulling her fatigues from her. _

_She watched him through lowered lids as he stripped his t-shirt over his head. She admired his chiselled physique and tattooed body, only for a second before he captured her lips once more. She let her hands flow over his body, feeling the muscles beneath twitch. She helped him out of his pants, feeling his heat against hers. God he was an amazing creature, she thought, gazing at his now naked frame, she'd seen men that were built like a brick wall before, but none were as tantalizing as Tommy!_

_She felt him thrust inside of her and moaned against his lips. Over and over again he thrust, lips maneuvering between hers and her sweet spot, until she thought she was going to explode. His thrusts quickened and with a low growl of pleasure, he collapsed into her arms, gasping for breath, both of their muscles twitching. When his breathing slowed, he rolled onto his side on the floor, pulling her into him, nuzzling his face into her hair and kissing the top of her head, she smiled sleepily to herself as they drifted off._

Tommy fought a shiver of delight as he remembered that last night on the Belukha Mountain. He missed her, more than he realized. Why hadn't he gone looking for her when he got back to the States? She was the only woman that made him feel so complete, and he threw her away when he left Afghanistan four years ago! On that thought, he hit his punching bag as hard as he could!

_The next day, the storm had passed and the sun was shining. Tommy knew before he opened his eyes, that he wasn't going to let this girl get away. She made him feel like a completely different man, he felt all of his worries just melt away when he was with her. Nope, he wasn't going to let her go anywhere. He hugged her tightly and kissed her forehead as her eyes fluttered open, "Morning beautiful!" He smiled down at her._

"_Morning!" She couldn't help but smile back, this man she had spent three days stuck in a shack with, made her feel more alive than she could ever imagine!_

_Neither of them wanted to move, but they knew they had to get a move on while the weather was fair! Reluctantly they pulled themselves up and got dressed, quickly had a breakfast ration pack before lifting their packs onto their backs and heading out. Tommy kept Emily at a close distance for the remainder of the trek down the mountain, letting her lead the way so when she started to slow down, he was right there to edge her on. They stumbled into a small village just after dark. They quickly dumped their fatigues to avoid any unwanted trouble, and with Emily's fluent Russian, they found a small inn to spend the night, posing as hikers. _

"_Oh my god! A real bed to sleep in!" She replied, collapsing onto the mattress, "And running water too!" It had been too long since she'd had a shower and a good night's sleep, without the thought of freezing to death!_

"_Lady's first!" Tommy gestured towards the bathroom, emptying his pack onto the bed._

_She grabbed her things and headed towards the bathroom, Tommy caught her round her waist, pulling her into him, kissing her softly. She looked up at him through hazy eyes and smiled then pulled him back to her, slowly stepping back towards the door._

"_Where you goin;?" He whispered with an evil grin that matched hers as they crossed the threshold of the bathroom door. He slid his hands from her face down her body, gripping her bum and pulling her up to him. She wrapped her legs around his waist as he sat her on the vanity, their kisses more urgent now as she slid her hands under this shirt, slipping it over his head, dropping it to the floor. _

Tommy was pulled from his thoughts by someone calling his name, "Tommy! Get over here!" It was Colt. Giving the bag one more punch, he turned towards his trainer with a slightly annoyed look.

"What's up?" Tommy asked as he approached the ring where Colt stood.

"I need you to spar with Marcos, I gotta get to a meeting right now, and you're the only one here I trust to leave with him!"

"Sure, Boyd, no problem!" Tommy replied, hopping up onto the mat. He was still irritated that Boyd had interrupted his walk down memory lane, but he would do just about anything for the man who helped him get to where he was at this point!

After he had lost Sparta two years prior, he was penniless, he needed a job and he needed a place to keep training, and Colt gave him both. Kept him and his Pops around to train in his gym and offered Tommy a job helping out around the place, training, sparring, cleaning, whatever needed to be done.

When Marcos' training session was over, Tommy headed for the showers, then straight back to Pops place. He was exhausted from the days work out, plus, he had to head down to Philly the next day, it was Brendan's birthday and Tess was throwing him a party. He couldn't miss his big brothers birthday, they had missed out on so much in their youth, they were trying hard now to make up for all that!

He collapsed on his bed, drifting off as soon as his head his the pillow, dreams filled with that beautiful brown-eyed face he found himself missing more and more as the hours went by.


End file.
